With all the best intentions, my first week of preparation for the 5K revealed the need for refurbishment. My partially-met goal was a week of seafood and 50% raw plant-based food, for 2 meals a day. Coach Gayle and I had a conversation about this, creating a positive re-frame for the coming week. This led me to understand something about using different strengths to find success. In searching for inspiration, I found some wonderful support.
And so it happened, then, that I got up and went to the kitchen this morning to make seafood-based lunch. That’s exactly where I found the inspirational quartet of chefs, Shirley, Goodness, Mercy, and Aunt Stasia. We worked happily, preparing tuna salad, chopping crunchy raw veggies to mix in. We seasoned with vinegar. And so, we prepared the core of lunches for several days. No waiting until lunchtime when I’m too tired and too hungry to fix tuna salad. Because I had such lovely company, it was done, not with pain, but joy.
What different strengths did I use? I considered the VIA Signature Strengths found under the category of “Temperance: strengths that protect against excess.” I was surprised to find “Forgiveness and mercy” as the first on the list! Next came, of all things, “Humility,” then “Prudence” and “Self regulation.” But those two I expected.
Here’s what I learned. I’m angry and have some gaps in forgiveness that give me an appetite to get even!! I’m never full, as vengeance creates a hole in me. So, positively speaking, I can write the offender’s name in the center of a page, write some words describing the hurt right under the name, and enclose them all in a big circle. Next, I can draw 15 (!) circles around the center one, and fill them with the “Goodness” things about that person. Mercy plugs the hole, appetite-wise!
Humility comes next. I found that I have to be humble enough to bless me along with the food, not seeking lime-light, but rather being modest in receiving kind feelings about myself. This fills me up and makes portion control a non-issue. My real hunger is for “succor.” And that is exactly where Aunt Stasia re-enters the inspiration. She is my model of humility, but more so, the very one I think of first when I think of blessing me.
Surely (aka “Shirley”) goodness and mercy (...and Aunt Stasia) will follow me all the days of my life.
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3 comments:
Wow, as usual. lots to think about (chew on and digest).
Forgiveness and mercy are surprising strengths to support temperance, and yet...wen I think about it, I do find that a certain resentment does make temperance more difficult for me. After all, why should I have to eat veggies and tunafish with vinegar, when I would much rather grab a big ole bowl of pasta or ice cream? Why should I have to juggle everything else in my life and schedule regular exercise? Why should I when certain other so-and-sos don't seem to have to...oh, hmm, perhaps the whole forgiveness thing makes sense after all.
I have been thinking a lot lately about ordinary holiness, by which i mean simply doing resentfully, I mean, joyfully, whatever task God has given me to do at this moment. Humility is definitely something that I need for that. Thank you for reminding me of your model of humility. Shirley, she will follow you all the days of your life.
Blessings,
Natalie
Wow back at you, Natalie! Your comments make my day. I'm glad you can extend the thinking on the blog post. I did do that forgiveness exercise and found it very powerful. There really WERE two sides to the story of a time I was hurt! Hmmm. Go figure. I'm still thinking about it, and it does curb my appetite for second helpings!!
Thanks for you comments, again, Natalie. I confess I get a yen to post in part to find out what YOU think!
V
I never really made the connection between forgiveness and food, but if we think about it- how much shame or guilt is there associated with eating? "Clean your plate- there are starving children in...."
"You shouldn't eat that, you'll get fat."
"A moment on the lips, a lifetime on the hips."
We've got such mental anguish associated with eating that anyone who triggers similar feelings triggers the same food response. I'm too tired from job-hunting/working-out/living that I'm just going to have cereal. It's nutritious...
One of the things I liked most about this post is the mention of Aunt Stasia- I didn't know her growing up as you did, so it's a neat insight for me when you have these instances of "Someone in the kitchen." I love it that you can call up your memory of your favorite aunt and be comforted by it as you were comforted by her when she was alive and by extension, help the rest of us find some comfort when you share with us :)
"[Shirley], Goodness and Mercy shall follow you all the days of your life."
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